Being my first official blog post, I figured it would only be fitting to share my heart behind stepping out into this music. Recently, I found my self at a place in life where I didn’t have a very clear sense of direction. With a beckoning that refused to be ignored, I had these passions and desires that were tugging at my heart. I knew that I had a heart for at-risk youth, and I knew that I had a passion for music. But what could I do with that? What was God calling me to do?
This left me with the age-old question. How do I discern what God’s plan is for my life? For some this might not be a stressful task, but I’m the guy who stands in the candy-bar aisle for 15min unable to decide whether I want a 5th Avenue or a Nutrageous. If I struggle with making such trivial decisions, then you can imagine my dilemma when it came to making more important ones. To say the least, decisiveness is not my forte. I wanted clear direction from God. Wouldn’t life be so much easier If God acted as our own personal Siri and responded to our questions on command? Yet, that is not how it works, and after much prayer, I still lacked clarity and felt confused as to what to do.
Around this time, the Parable of the Talents kept being randomly brought to my attention(Matthew 25:14-30). Perhaps God was trying to send me a message. For those who aren’t familiar with the parable, it is essentially about a man who distributes talents to 3 of his servants according to their ability before he leaves on a journey. After a long time away, the Lord of the servants came back to settle accounts with them and to see how they had used what they were given. Two of the servants were good stewards and were faithful with what they were given and one of the servants hid his talent and did nothing with it. The two servants who were faithful with what they were given were considered good and their lord was well pleased, but the servant that did not utilize what he was given was considered wicked and lazy. When I read this, I felt so convicted because I realized that the lazy servant was me. I was allowing my uncertainty to immobilize and cripple me from moving forward. Although I wasn’t exactly sure what it would look like to bring some of these ideas to fruition, I knew it was time to do something.
I decided it was time to seek counsel and get advice. So I called Matt, a mentor of mine, to discuss some of this over lunch. After sharing my dilemma, I received a pivotal piece of advice that was so simple, yet so profound. Matt said, “It is easier for God to steer a moving ship than one that is docked. Keep that ‘ship’ moving towards God and allow him to make course corrections along the way. That’s what life is all about.” Hearing this was so freeing and it changed my entire perspective on discerning Gods direction for our lives. This whole time, I had been apprehensive to move forward because I didn’t want to make a wrong decision. I was waiting for directions or some kind of guidance to show up at my doorstep, not realizing that my inaction was actually an action. I was being the lazy servant. God doesn’t want us to be paralyzed by fear; He wants us to move forward in confidence trusting that He will meet us in our faith. Later, it dawned on me that the master in the parable didn’t tell the servants what to do with the talents they had been given, he just wanted to see that they were faithful and good stewards with what they had. This got me thinking that maybe that is how it is with God. Maybe there isn’t a step-by-step tutorial on how to use our gifts. Maybe He just wants us to work diligently and to be good stewards for the furthering of his Kingdom by utilizing the talents, stories, characteristics, abilities, and passions He has blessed us with. Maybe along the way, He will show us where we need to be.
Proverbs 3:5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and he shall direct your paths.” If I can be completely honest, I still don’t know exactly what God’s plan is for my life or what will transpire from any of this, but I believe God gives us certain talents and passions for a reason so I am stepping out in faith trusting that He will direct my path along the way. I want to be a good steward of whatever gifts I may have, whether that is my past experiences, my passion for working with at-risk youth, or this music. When it’s all said and done, I want to know I used every bit of talent I had for God’s glory so when my Lord returns I might hear, “Well done, good and faithful servant; you were faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.”
